Time Out - apt 46

My mother always said that at some point in a woman’s life, she should live by herself. I never really understood what she meant until Madelyn moved out. Although we had the best of times as roommates, I was a big girl now and living by myself made sense at this point in my life. I lived by myself in my twenties and loved it; but when you are in your thirties and that much closer to finally “getting you”; living by yourself offers a new freedom. Every day when you come home you are free to explore your wants, ideas, feelings, and desires. Whether they are spiritual or sexual, no one is there to stand in your way. Simply stated: You can play with your hair or play with your pussy with no interruptions. Living by yourself offers solace—true solace that can only be achieved in your own space. You can hear your voice or you can experience utter silence. You can have true quiet time, a time when you can hear only your thoughts. This silence allows you to have passion. Passion with yourself. A feeling of “Honey, I’m home”—but instead of making an announcement, you make a statement by just being. There is no one there to validate your existence in that moment. It is okay to be alone sometimes; it’s okay to be “okay” with yourself.

Just knowing that you can come in, drop your bags, kick off your sneakers at the front door and don’t have to worry about moving them—that’s stellar. The freedom of going into the bathroom, peeling off your clothes to shower, and leaving your panties on the floor. Cooking while you are naked and being able to scratch your ass, knowing that no one is watching.

We all enjoy good company, but learning to enjoy your own peace is monumental. Openly accepting your space is important. Whether you are in a crowded room or by yourself, it’s about accepting who you are and being okay with that. It’s all about fessing up and admitting what you want and need. There are only a handful of us who can look in the mirror and see the truth. The funny thing is that if you are smart, you’ll only see yourself. Every time you look in the mirror, it allows you to be a narcissist. You see your face, your lips, your eyes. You only see what TRULY matters to you – YOU.

Sometime being a narcissist is soo cool…


  1. I agree – living by yourself is the best. no roomates – NO B.S. to deal with.

  2. After college I vowed to never have roomates agin and I haven’t. Here’s to APT 46 and my APT 7C !

  3. LOL..I wish i could afford to live by myself.

  4. Living BY yourself can force a lesson in living WITH yourself, and that is priceless. You are right about the joys of being able to kick back in your own space. The challenge comes when you are not comfortable in your own skin and for that reason I think many of us fear living alone. We should all be inspired to look into that mirror and love what we see. The happier you are with YOU the happier the home, solo or shared.

  5. Living by yourself proves whether you are truly happy or not! People who can’t stand living by themselves are often times not happy with themselves. I have lived by myself for years and found that I am happy with myself, so happy in fact that I fear having to live with someone else! I have gotten so used to it, that the idea of sharing my space is frightening. If I get married is it wrong for my husband and I to live in separate spaces? I think sharing a space at this time in my life could end badly!!! Or maybe I’ll find someone rich to marry and he can buy a big enough house to stay out of each others way!!!

  6. Reading today’s blog inspired me in a way that only one person I know can comprehend. [Maria-:-O] I’m in a transitional phase of my life where I’m beginning……again….however, this new phase is differs from the past in that for the first time in my life, I feel things are FINALLY lining up for me to prepare me for something greater. I’ll be moving to my OWN place before the year is over, possibly even by the end of the summer, and I could’nt be more excited! Moving in with MYSELF, has given me the motivation to continue to do better to acheive my goals. Here comes Margarita Tuesdays…party of one! Thank God!

  7. I love living by myself. It is so nice to be in your own space. I kinda miss my roommate but she is just a phone call away.

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